Coronvirus Covid 19 Survival Guide (comedy)

My dear readers, I know that you are looking for leadership at this time of crisis and I feel that I with no medical knowledge or experience whatsoever should offer some advice.  Afterall, if Trump is doing it, it must be grand.

Sure really it’s all a bit of common sense.

We all know that the best way to get better from something is to pass it on.  This should be really easy in the open plan offices we have these days (don’t worry, I’m sorted).  So god forbid you become infected, make sure to have a good cough here, there and everywhere.  I’m sure you’ll get lucky.  If there’s people you don’t like now would be time to spend some time with them.

Very important – remember the three second rule.  Otherwise, I guess you really should think about washing things.

Don’t drink water.  Only drink “living” water from fruit.  Eh, you want to die being fashionable, don’t you?  And everyone know germs need water to survive.

Make sure you have Netflix.  Sometimes the apocalypse can be a tad slow and boring.  You may have to spend a lot of time indoors.

Watch the Walking Dead and remember things could always be worse.  Mmm scratch that one.  It could teach you useful survival tips though.

Don’t plan for the future.  There’s simply no point.  No more studying or saving for trips that are now impossible.

Don’t panic.  Only joking, of course you should!  We’re all going to die.

(The writer accepts no responsibility for this article.)